george carlin quotes government

It will not be with jack-boots. It seems only right. "Boy everyone in this country is running around yammering about their fucking rights. The main reason Santa is so jolly is that he knows where all the bad girls live. You will do things in the name of a group that you would never do on your own. Question it, and try to see the world for what it actually is, as opposed to what someone or some company or some organization or some government is trying to represent it as, or present it as, however they've mislabeled it or dressed it up or told you. George Carlin "The planet is fine. By the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Its what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. 14 George Carlin Quotes on Education, Kids & Parents - Fatherly Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.George Carlin, Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuckGeorge Carlin, I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. 2023 Inspirationfeed. Tell them what you've painted is wet, they have to touch it to believe. George Carlin was no stranger to controversy. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? } George Carlin Shitting on Government for 8 Minutes Straight LaughPlanet 900K subscribers Subscribe 42K 1.3M views 2 years ago #GeorgeCarlin #Comedy #America George Carlin Shitting on Government. I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be. George Carlin, Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time. George Carlin, Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. George Carlin, I think people should be allowed to do what they want. He was a true outspoken man that we can emulate in many ways. //]]>. Every day we present the best quotes! Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breaths away. #privileges. The future will soon be a thing of the past. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. Because theres no money in that problem. If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin, 32. Deal with it. Maybe this time itll work. Then you live in an old age home. George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. gads.type = "text/javascript"; George Carlin Quotes (Author of Brain Droppings) - Goodreads 100 George Carlin Funny Quotes On Religion, Stupid People George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.George Carlin, I, myself, have killed six people. Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things. George Carlin, 19. If it requires a uniform, its a worthless endeavor. George Carlin, 11. Keep em showing up at those jobs. George Carlin, 81. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear themusic. Born: May 12, 1937. I think that speaks for itself. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin, 73. I hate a group of people with a common purpose. function q(c, r) { On The Simple Solution To Parenthood's Most Difficult Question "Parents are burning these kids out on structure. The Catholic Church alone could wipe out the national debt if all you did was tax their real estate.George Carlin, In America, anyone can become president. Its only a piece of cloth. George Carlin, 75.The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful of insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. Thats the problem. George Carlin, 58. " Forget the politicians. [CDATA[ George Carlin, The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. Maybe this time itll work. George Carlin, 59. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("grsession", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. George Carlin, 64. Thats the problem., I call him Governor Bush because thats the only political office hes ever held legally in this country., Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance., Forget the politicians. Thats the only thing keeping it and expanding it wherever possible. "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). He was regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics of all time. That is against their interests. g.parentNode.insertBefore(A, g) Life is not measured by the number of breath we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. Good, honest, hard-working people: white collar, blue collar, it doesn't matter what color shirt you have on. In this blog post, weve compiled some of his most compelling quotes on the subject for you to consider as well! Weve added years to life, not life to years. George Carlin, 6. Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that. George Carlin, 24. They should be more vivid. There is only a short pause before the next horrifying event. Keep in mind, the news media are not independent; they are a sort of bulletin board and public relations firm for the ruling class-the people who run things. Beneath George Carlins biting sarcasm and razor-sharp wit lay a heartfelt indignation at the injustices he observed in the world around him. We talk too much,love too seldom, and hate too often. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. " George Carlin 14. 21 George Carlin Quotes On Government And Politics return null; The owners of this country know the truth: It's called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. }, googletag.pubads().disableInitialLoad(); Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. George Carlin. We hope these George Carlin quotes on life, religion and government will make you smile as well as share some important facts with you. It's a big club and you ain't in it. If you burn the flag, youre burning the flag for what you perceive to be the bad things the country has done. "//securepubads.g.doubleclick.net/tag/js/gpt.js"; Keep in mind, the news media are not independent; they are a sort of bulletin board and public relations firm for the ruling class-the people who run things. stylesheet.rel = "stylesheet"; Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Im talking about the real owners now the real owners. He was regarded as an influential and significant comic of all time. " George Carlin We are in a country, and in a world that is run by people who brainwash , . I think every day all children should have 3 hours of daydreaming. The people are f***ed. About Us | Privacy Policy | Terms | Contact Us, Ronald Reagan Religious Quotes To Live Your Life As A True Believer, www.brainyquote.com/authors/george-carlin-quotes, www.quotes.thefamouspeople.com/george-carlin-1484.php, www.everydaypower.com/george-carlin-quotes. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. Everything He ever makesdies.George Carlin, Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?George Carlin, Thats why they call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.George Carlin, Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.George Carlin, There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. George Carlin quotes on the American government In America, anyone can become president. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. 125 Best George Carlin QuotesFunny George Carlin Quotes on Life Welcome | QuoteSaga googletag.pubads().setTargeting("resource", "author_22782"); . Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if youre really looking.George Carlin, Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die,your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. Do share your thoughts with us in the comment section and tell us which one was your favoriteGeorge Carlin quotesor if you want to ask any questions or have any query send them viaContact Us. if (window.ue && window.ue.tag) { window.ue.tag('author:quotes:signed_out', ue.main_scope);window.ue.tag('author:quotes:signed_out:mobileWeb', ue.main_scope); } Stand-Up Comedy. var source = getCookieWithoutJQuery("source"); 101 Marianne Williamson Quotes That Will Enlighten You. Lets get started! Its so fuckin heroic.George Carlin, The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.George Carlin, If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?George Carlin, I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin, 10. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("gr_author", "false"); Did you ever stop to think about all the people we kill? " George Carlin Quotes Carlin, who was known for spewing critical rhetoric against the government, organized religion and big business, first delivered the quote during his 2005 HBO comedy special, Life Is Worth. Did you ever stop to thnk about all the people we kill? War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle-class and lower-class men off to die. George Carlin, 78. This video is an ideal way to start your day off on a funny and thought provoking note and stay inspired through. 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Died: June 22, 2008 (aged 71) George Carlin Quotes . Its important in life if you dont give a shit. I'm the Founder of SucceedFeed.com and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and being apart of the Succeed Feed community. [CDATA[ "Laugh often, long and loud. 4. Don't forget to confirm subscription in your email. Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.George Carlin, When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?George Carlin, The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.George Carlin, Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.George Carlin, I have as much authority as the Pope. People are wonderful. George Carlin, If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Ice Cube Shares George Carlin Quote About Politicians: 'They - Newsweek If viewers had discretion, most television shows would not be on the air. George Carlin, 54. Whether youre looking for inspirational or funny quotes by George Carlin or whether youre looking for his famous quotes politics and education, its all here. Government is an important institution. //Quote by George Carlin: "Political correctness is fascism pretending to The government doesnt care about you, or your children, or your rights, or your welfare, or your safety. Some people dream of things that never were, and ask, why not? Source; . They all said: Try to live together peacefully. BAM! George Carlin, Dont just teach your children to readTeach them to question what they read.Teach them to question everything.George Carlin, How can He be perfect? 4. 5. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. George Carlin, 9. A person of good intelligence and of sensitivity cannot exist in this society very long without having some anger about the inequality and its not just a bleeding-heart, knee-jerk, liberal kind of a thing it is just a normal human reaction to a nonsensical set of values where we have cinnamon flavored dental floss and there are people sleeping in the street. George Carlin, 68. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. George Carlin 'Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners.' Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) And a list of people theyre going to visit at 3am. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("surface", "mw"); They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. You have owners. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time. 123 Witty George Carlin Quotes on Life and Politics - Internet Pillar My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Its never just a game when youre winning. George Carlin, 7. var ue_mid = "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1"; What George Carlin Believed About Religion "Events.SushiEndpoint": "https://unagi.amazon.com/1/events/com.amazon.csm.csa.prod", When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. In America, anyone can become president. googletag.pubads().enableSingleRequest(); People are wonderful one at a time. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Laugh often, long and loud. Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. Carlin is well-known for pivoting from a strait-laced, suit-and-tie approach to standup in the late 1960s and early . Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. "Application": "GoodreadsMonolith", })(); His critical thinking shines on stage and opens your eyes to modern-day problems that most folks are oblivious to. You get kicked out when youre too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born on May 12, 1937, was an Americanstand-up comedian, actor, social critic, and author. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. But there is an I in independence, individuality, andintegrity. George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. I have certain rules I live by. Hes not a cheese. Right in the fucking head! Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. George Carlin's Estate, via HBO. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. George Carlin, 5. When you are born in America, you get a front row seat. if (window.Mobvious === undefined) { Witty George Carlin Quotes 1. He is a sucker for good coffee, Indian food, and video games. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. And probably increase.George Carlin, And heres something else, another problem you might have: Suppose your prayers arent answered. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.George Carlin, Im completely in favor of theseparation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enoughon their own, so both of them together iscertain death.George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.George Carlin, If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Its important in life if you dont give a shit. This is the best we can do folks. What do you say? 4994. Thank you! He Was Fatally Beaten by Memphis Police Now People Around the World Are Sharing #SunsetsForTyre in His Honor, 41 Daughter Quotes That Will Touch and Melt Your Heart, 20 Most Inspiring Martin Luther King Jr. And when you suspend your individual beauty you also give up a lot of your humanity. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. George Carlin, 74. And far from staying to the safer path, he leapt time and again past the cliff of common wisdom, in the hopes of rattling us into questioning the way we live. The challenge is to find it.George Carlin, I put a dollar in a change machine. "https:" : "http:") + var url; var cookies = document.cookie.split('; '); We havent tried that for a while. } By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. Your dog thinks you're a god. George Carlin. We made 'em up. I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. That's the problem. "George Carlin confronts reality". Pictures. They want obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. I think the life cycle is all backwards. His jokes were certainly aimed to provoke others but the hows and whys of it made him so exceptional. And just dumb enough to passively accept it., The government doesnt lie, it engages in disinformation., Im a loyal American and Im not happy unless I let the government and industry poison me a little bit every day., Government wants to control information and control language because thats the way you control thought, and basically thats the game theyre in., Bullshit is the glue that binds us as a nation., I believe the government should step in where the free market fails., Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a fuck about them., A flag is supposed to represent everything that a country does.. Theyre all in favour of the unborn. Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. Now you can finally see what made George Carlin the dad tick. If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.'. }()); When you are born, you get a ticket to the freak show. Aw, hes a comedian. ", Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Interview with Todd Leopold, edition.cnn.com. Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck. George Carlin, 52. Whether you agree with him or not, George Carlins views on government are definitely worth considering. 70 Wise Quotes From George Carlin | Inspirationfeed It creates a hostile work environment. George Carlin, 65. var ue_id = "RW7VD4AVX1H9239WWVVN"; Its no secret that George Carlin was a bit of a political philosopher. #government. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. George Carlin, 45. George Carlin. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. You have owners. Those who decide what news you will or will not hear are paid by, and tolerated purely at the whim of, those who hold economic power. function getCookieWithoutJQuery(name) { You have no choice. Showing 1-30 of 421 "The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept." George Carlin tags: humor , insanity , lies , lying , self-indulgence , truth 19588 likes Like "The planet is fine. I dont believe anything the government tells me., Governments dont want well-informed, well-educated people capable of critical thinking. A Death! "ObfuscatedMarketplaceId": "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1" I think people should be allowed to do what they want. George Carlin Philosophy, Real, Lying 192 Copy quote I've set my own rules to live by. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote - Goodreads.com George Carlin. "Never argue with an idiot. Don't forget: YOU have the power to make ANYTHING happen. What are your favorite George Carlin quotes? George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) // page settings Electricity is really just organized lightning. }); Get future posts byemail,oryou can follow us onInstagram,Pinterest,andFacebook. If you can connect with theseGeorge Carlin quotes, subscribe to our blog so that you dont miss a single post. George Carlin Quotes on Politics - LiveAbout If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. document.getElementsByTagName("head")[0].appendChild(stylesheet); Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. Laugh until you gasp for breath. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

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